Infidelity can cause serious psychological stress, dealing with it requires calmness and realignment of priorities.

Nawar Jarakji - 8812727
Case Study 2 – Helen’s Case (Helen is a borrowed name and for teaching purposes only)

15/09/2023
Client’s situation:
Helen's husband has cheated on her. She is both shocked and angry. Helen wants me to help her make a decision about whether to continue the marriage or not. I will outline how I would use the “Life of the Soul Model” because my client is a devoted Christian, and by knowing that I can choose to alter my style accordingly.

Mentor’s Response:
Oh Helen, I understand this is a tough situation. You need to remember that God doesn’t give you problems which you cannot handle 1Corinthians 10:13; God loves everyone and helps whoever in need. Is cheating something you consider a deal breaker in your marriage? Do you believe your husband’s action was unchristian? Do you believe he is worthy of forgiveness and redemption?

I suggest you take your time and complete this simple assignment at home: We call it the ABC model (Activating Event => Rigid Believes => Negative Consequences), where you start by writing down the consequences you felt from the infidelity that happened. Note down your tone of voice while writing as well, is it anger, is it sadness, disappointment, or shame from your society and belief system? Then note down who do you blame in this scenario, is it your husband, is it God, do you feel betrayed by either or both? Or maybe you might blame yourself for allowing this to happen?

Next session, we will apply the DRDT (Daily Record of Dysfunctional Thoughts), a simple exercise that notes down those emotions and beliefs and look at them as hypotheses (meaning: objectively), we will challenge each hypothesis with alternative justifications, and work towards finding the best outcome that will make you feel satisfied, happy, and maintain your faith with God, and the love and support of your family and community.